I had a job for a couple of weeks. I started the day after Labor Day and quit this evening.

When I went to the interview and the orientation it sounded great. They were going to train me to be a manager. There was to be four stages: Marketing and Merchendising, where I was supposed to learn how to sell, Training and Evaluating, where I was supposed to train other people how to sell (though they never said that's what I was going to be doing until I got there), Management and Satallite, which was when I was going to be in charge of other people, and Administration, when I learned the inner workings of the office. I got through the first phase, then went on a satallite instead of actually training anyone. It was okay, but the leaders were weak and my car broke down. And i was still selling perfume. I don't even like perfume. And I don't like pressuring people. So why would I want to pressure people into buying perfume? On Saturday they said I had this week (when I went on another satallite), then next week I'd be in charge of people on another trip, this one really big and in Montana, then I'd be able to run a couple myself, and that would be the third phase. But before that I'd have to average 8-10 bottles a day. My best day ever was 4.

So I went on the trip this week, in a car with no insurance and a driver who, I found out after riding in the car with her for a day, had no license. At that point I informed her that I'd be driving for the rest of the trip. Just that was enough to confirm in my mind that this wasn't a company I want to work for, even once I do get my own office, because I'd have to teach other people to do these unscrupulous things. Money just doesn't motivate me that much. We came back Wednesday because one of the girls started throwing up blood. I quit when we got back. There were other reasons, too, but I think what I have is enough. Basically it was a pyramid scheme except legal and even two months on the bottom of it was more than I wanted to deal with.

But in good news, I'm back with Tim and Gina again. I hope we'll stay that way this time. If we don't I know it'll be over for good (or at least for a very long time). That in itself would make it easier for me, but I don't think it'll come to that, because I kicked the depression and I've been through the coals (I made so little money on the road I lost five pounds in three days because I couldn't afford to eat), and I'm out of the coals now and looking for something that's a little more morally sound. Rose says there's a shortage of Loan Processors right now so I'll start looking for a position doing that. Can't work for the Money Store though; I just went through that bit. Damn new policies.

little later

Just read the last couple entries when I finished updating the index like I usually dio ad realized I should tell about why we got back together again. See, we'd been doig a good job of staying platonic for the most part and the extra affection was all stuff I could handle, and I did have to remove myself once but I did remove myself so it was all good. but thursday before i left on the first trip (wow, two weeks already) tim was sick so I went over after work to keep him company and he wanted snuggles... even into bed. I was kind of torn then but I wanted it so bad, just to snuggle and sleep with them again, so I agreed and stayted the night. In the morning we all kind of looked at each other and asked "what now?" I said as long as I knew where I stood I would be okay but I couldn't be left not knowing whether that was one night or a restart and if it was one night it wasn't going to be more because I wasn't going to be the girlfriend when it was convenient. Actually I didn't say all that, though I thought it. I just said that I needed to know where I stood... i know they already knew the rest. They're good that way. but anyway I guess they decided that sure enough i was doing a lot better so why not give it another try.

Just to clear it up that it wasn't my idea to get back together this time.

And now I'm going to go to the bathroom then go to bed and sleep in tomorrow for the first time since I started that job.

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